I’ve decided to return to Throwback Thursday, or #tbt as it is known on social media. When I did #tbt before, I posted older poetry and stories. My plan for the summer is to repost older stuff. I have quite a collection of posts, and I don’t have a good archive system for those who’d like to read older posts. So for the new few months, every Thursday I’ll be reposting older stuff that I think could use some love.
A letter to my younger nerd first appeared on January 26, 2015.
Confession: I was a big nerd back in the day, of the glasses-wearing bookworm variety. I was not cool, not an inch of me. I’m still nowhere near cool. (Do people still use that word or has it been retired like groovy and far out?)
This letter is to me and maybe to you too.
Dear sweet child that gets called nerd!
Know that there is someone who loves you deeply, unconditionally. Someone who thinks you are very special. Someone who will always forgive you. Someone who will always root for you.
Sometimes we go through hard times, things seem bleak, and none of it makes any sense. There is no greater meaning to some of the randomness. Sometimes there is no way to explain cruelty or unfortunate events.
Do not become cruel as a response to cruelty. Do not become hardened in response to hardness. Do not change who you are to please others. Please yourself. Keep your purpose in mind and continue in the direction of your dreams.
Know this: it gets better. Life gets better. You will live your dreams. Just stay true. Stay true to you. You’d be amazed what you can accomplish as long as you believe you can. You are an amazing being made of star dust. Never forget that.
We are all special and we are all in pain, in need of compassion. Stay close to your heart. Be compassionate. Be forgiving. Firstly with yourself.
Life can be difficult and there will be times it will all seem pointless. Do not get lost in that illusion. Do not get distracted or discouraged. Just keep going.
Don’t run from yourself. Don’t hide who you really are. Do not be ashamed of the beautiful human being that you are. You are here at this time to do something only you can do. Do not forget your purpose. Embrace your humanness with all your imperfections. They are what make you unique and beautiful. Live your inner truth. It will lead you further than anything you do for the sake of popularity, attention, or whatever other reason.
Remember this: you are loved. Know that you are always loved. Even when you falter and make mistakes, you are loved. Even when others seem to turn away from you, you are loved. You are loved and you are love – a powerful energy source.
With great love,
Your older (and hopefully wiser) self
Don’t run from yourself
I spent many years hiding from my real self. Ashamed of who I really am. Well, I am here to say that the real me is fabulous and much more fun to be around than the fake me, that is if you like art and books and all that nerdy stuff.
I am awkward – it was never just a phase in middle school for me. I prefer to work on a creative project than go out to a party. Don’t get me wrong, I like parties, I just prefer them to be a little on the boring side. No excess booze or black outs for me.
I love classical music. The emotions in it seem more pure.
I like words in an almost perverse way. I keep notebooks with words I like. I study the dictionary and thesaurus.
I’m pretty sure there are others like me. Hopefully some of you embraced your real selves instead of hiding like me. Although I’m late to the party, I am embracing my inner nerd. I love me, all of me. I want to live according to my inner truth. I don’t want to be concerned with others and what they think.